Big Announcement

Hey y’all it’s your favorite Bluebone Karen, sorry it’s been a while. These last couple weeks meant that grades and miracles needed to be put into action.

We are really sorry to announce that we are creating two different blogs but we will still be together, so don’t get completely upset. We just have different ideas and two different blogs could show those ideas rather than spamming y’all you know?

So don’t be too sad lol. We will still be around, just not the same time.

She will be putting up her blog in a little bit, hopefully before the summer really kicks in.

Trying to make the home stretch

Hey it’s your favorite bluebone, Karen! Sorry I haven’t been posting too much, it’s just that school always comes first and I recently just started dancing, along with a thousand other things. BUT, regardless I lead myself back to Dark Skin & Mangos!

It’s the spring semester and a girl tired as hell!

The weather getting warmer, it’s pop out weather, and I just feel like not enough people going to see my outfit if I just be in class all day lol. (I’m kidding. Not that much.)

I’ve been struggling y’all. My GPA is looking like some a cheap ass gas price. I told my mom and she told me “Well, madam college. You betta be finding your way home.”

I said, “Mommy are you serious?”

She then said, “No, I’m comedian. Am I serious? Okay oh. Bye.” Then she hung up on me. African Parents 101 for you.

She had me laughing, she’s coming to get me so I can go back to the lovely Montgomery County of Maryland.

But, school has been weighing on my head trying to catch a 3.2 and above is like sort of harder than I thought because it’s spring semester and you know I just get lazy and I started dancing on campus and a couple of other things I tell you guys later.

Update on my life:

I am MORE THAN single and happily embracing the fact that I am.
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I’ve been doing that make me happy, dancing, writing WAY more.
I got myself a mentor and he is absolutely great, I appreciate him dearly.
I am in the process of getting a double major in Screenwriting & Animation with Multi-media Journalism with a minor in Creative Writing.
I surrounded myself with better friends (feels like a breath of fresh air).
I understand myself as a person and understand that people are NO longer going to push me around because I will set your whole life straight.

Unfortunately some negative things have happened to me, BUT that doesn’t outweigh the good that has happened.

Bluebone is signing out and I just moved back home for almost a week now. I’ve been sleeping my life away BUT this summer is my summer. I am claiming it now. 

MARK MY WORDS. 

HBCU vs PWI Debate

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Time for Some Real Talk… *inserts thinking emoji*

So Lets Settle This Once and for All;

Alright so we all know about the infamous HBCU versus PWI (predominantly white institution) debate. Yea, it’s a topic that black college students have been talking about for a long time and are still talking about it. I was on twitter a while back and the debate came up once again. This topic has been on my mind lately because I have some family members looking at schools and of course I urge them to go to a HBCU. However, some people I know have sooo many reasons why they think PWI’s are the better choice. Now trust me, I can go on and on about this topic all day. I noticed a lot of people on twitter were saying how tired they are of this argument and how it doesn’t matter which kind of institution we attend, because we are black and getting an education from somewhere so that’s all that matters right? Wrong. (I mean yes it’s a good thing, but not the only thing)

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Now let me start off by saying I have nothing against someone black attending a PWI. I do have something against someone black who attends a PWI and disrespects, discredits, or downplays HBCU’s in the process. As a HBCU student, I know very well that going to college, no matter the type of institution but especially at a HBCU is more than just “getting an education”.

The main point that so many people try and make in order to explain why attending a PWI is more beneficial as a black student is because a HBCU will not prepare us for the “real world”.

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Alright lets discuss this. By the “real world” you mean the white world right? This claim would only be stated by someone who believes all black people are the same; or that from being around mostly black people, we wouldn’t quite know how to associate with or speak to white people; that we wouldn’t have enough diversity in our backgrounds to know how to adjust our vernacular when speaking to a white person when it’s time to apply for jobs or work in corporate America. Attending a HBCU wouldn’t prepare me for the real world? This is basically saying that black people operate completely different than other races and other humans. Black people aren’t in the corporate world? Attending an HBCU will not teach me how to speak to white people professionally? What is the difference between speaking to a white person or a black person professionally? We won’t be able to turn off our ebonics right? Also wrong.

Or what about the famous “HBCU’s lack diversity”, as if PWI’s commonly have an even distribution of races; as if black people aren’t diverse; or as if black people are the only race that attends HBCU’s; or as if all black are the same and grew up in the same environment. Not at all, as we have students and professors of all races. And please tell me about the diversity amongst white Americans?  What kind of diversity would we be experiencing at a PWI? The underlying point that those who argue against HBCU’s are trying to make is that our institutions are inferior. Our professors couldn’t possibly teach or prepare us as well; our networking opportunities couldn’t possibly be as helpful or frequent because it’s all from a historically black college or university, right? Also wrong.

Look all I’m saying is stop coming up with reasons to discredit or downplay HBCU’s. Now of course it’s great that we are black and getting an education, no matter which kind of institution we attend; however, there is much more to attending college, specifically to attending a HBCU than just that. My fellow HBCU students/grads know what I’m talking about. So the point is, a PWI is no better than a HBCU so don’t downplay it, or make it seem as if PWI’s are superior. And can I just add that there is NOTHING like going to a hbcu. Here we taught about our history, the right way. Our schools erase the idea of inferiority and subordinancy that has been taught to us. Just sayin’. Put some respeck on the HBCU name!

feel free to comment your thoughts…

Hair & The Black Girl

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Hey Guys, Time for Some Chit-Chat… it’s the Bluebones

Alright so from the title, you can see that this entry will be about the hair/ hairstyles of us black girls, with some serious discussion to go along with it.

So hair has been on my mind lately, mostly because I’ve been thinking about doing the big chop in the summertime. Buttt the other day I was casually on twitter and I saw a tweet that said “I can’t be with a baldheaded girl, what I look like walking around with a girl that got the same shapeup as me?” Or it was something like that. (That personally pisses me off because that is not an issue you should be mad at me about. You need to take that up with your barber: Karen)

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Now there’s a lot of underlying problems within this statement, and it’s not the first, second, or third time I’ve heard this from a guy. First of all, why would a bald girl on your side make you uncomfortable??? Don’t even get me started on the #MasculinitySoFragile topic, lets save that for another day lol. Anyways, it got me thinking about how a lot of men have very specific preferences for their girl’s hair. Some men won’t look twice at a natural girl, while some won’t look twice at a girl with a weave. Heck, some wouldn’t look twice at a girl with braids, or locs. Now personally, I don’t give a damn what a mans preferences are, that won’t stop me from doing anything. However, there are plenty of us black girls who become discouraged to take on certain hairstyles simply because men won’t be interested or find us attractive say if we have a shortcut, or or long braids or locs. Yea can you believe it, men– or should I say BOYS like this actually exist.

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Now ladies, get whichever hairstyle you’d like, don’t buy into the childish preferences of some of these boys. On the other hand, some of us girls don’t get certain hairstyles because of our own fears or insecurities. Personally, I’ve been wanting to do the big chop for so long, not because I have perm or heat damage, but because I really like short hair; well that and because I hate doing my hair lol, so I’ve been doing protective styles. But I keep putting off cutting my hair. Now one thing we have to remember if we want to cut our hair is that long hair is not vital or essential to beauty!!!! I have finally gotten rid of that notion. So now I just have to get into that “yolo” state of mind. But if you want to go natural, then go natural! Wanna get locs? DO IT! Honestly I encourage everyone to be natural. It’s so freeing and wonderful lol. It’s a lot of work though, that’s why I want to cut my hair because girl, I don’t have the patience for this lol. But if you do, channel your inner Lauryn or Erykah, or India and be naturallll, there’s nothing like it.

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Now I do have an opinion on weaves, I’m sorry I have to say it. Ok, so I don’t have an issue with girls wearing weaves (every now and then), as long as they love and appreciate the beautiful curly or nappy hair underneath. I just think why wear hair that’s no where near our natural texture? Society has painted a picture of the beautiful woman, and her “beautiful” hair, and it looks nothing like ours, I know.  It’s made a lot of us feel insecure about our hair, which is why I think the entire idea of heating, or literally sewing in hair that is not even close to our texture, came from. That’s why we wear weaves, or get perms, or are always flat-ironing our hair! Now if this sounds like you, then pleaseee learn to love your black hair! I know so many girls who are constantly putting weaves in their head because they don’t care for their hair or curl pattern. Which ever curl pattern you have, from 3a to 4c, it is beautiful, and unique to us! We don’t have to have the same texture as Brazilians, or Malaysians, or whichever texture some of us like to wear. Now trust me I’ve been at a point where I hated my black hair, and I wished it was longer, and thinner, and less nappy. I used to thrive off of the fact that I thought, or I wanted to think my hair was 3c, when in reality it’s 4a. I used to be so glad I didn’t have the kinkiest hair on the list. But I had to learn to appreciate my, and all natural hair types. This is the hair we are born with, this is our crown, no one has hair as beautiful and versatile as we do. I mean we can literally do just about any style with our strong and full heads or hair. Some of our boys and men don’t like their hair types either. Mhmm, I peeped. A lot of guys these days are getting rid or their temp- fade haircuts if their hair type isn’t 3a, b, or c. And their working to get those “nice” and pretty waves, which is pretty hard if you have 4c textured hair. But who says guys or anyone needs to have that “pretty curly” textured hair that a lot of us don’t have. No matter the pattern of your curls, they’re still luscious. So everyone, LOVE YOUR HAIR!!!!

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feel free to comment your thoughts…

Karen’s Dreamy Men List

Woody McClain is my husband so no touch. 🙂

Hey Y’all it’s your girls, The Original Bluebones, I just wanted to give a small insight on what I think is my preference of men or what type of man I would like.

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1. Idris Elba

He is just a smooth dark skin chocolate brother. I just can’t with him. Ever since I first saw him, I always had the fattest crush on him. His accent is just everything and he’s African? Oh chai. Abeg, you no have wife. Come marry me now. Age ain’t nothing but a number.

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2. Lance Gross

He is just another smooth dark skin chocolate brother that has my heart. Since I saw him on House of Panye, any movie or show that has him in it, I will watch it from start to finish just for him. Fun fact: He actually used to get teased for smiling so much, but he has one of the prettiest and most beautiful smiles I have ever seen. His daughter is so cute to put on top of that.

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3. A$AP ROCKY

He be that pretty motherfu*ker, Harlem what he reppin. A$AP Rocky is one of my favorite artist and so cute to me. That smile, that fashion sense and he just speak truth like I know y’all have seen his videos of when he says “It’s a men world, but pussy make the world go ’round.” Since he came out, I have been following him since. I loved him in Dope (one of my favorite movies).

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4. Chance the Rapper (Chancelor Johnathan Bennett)

This is my husband, this was so hard to choose a gif of him because I love him so much like he has my heart. He is the cutest thing alive, like if I could marry him I would. He is only 4 years older than I am. I love Chance the Rapper, everything about him just excites me. His lips, those cheekbones, his smile, he is such a jokester. I love him you guys. 95% of the time, if you see me and ask me what I am listening to, it’s one of his songs.

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5. Taylor Bennett (Yes, it’s Chancelor’s little brother)

I couldn’t find a gif of him, but yes it is his little brother. I love him just as much. Everything about Chance is the same reason why I love Taylor. I recently just go into his music too. Check out the song Grown Up Fairytales by Taylor, Chance, and Jeremih. I recently just found out that he is bisexual, but he’s still dreamy as hell.

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6. Luke James

Luke James has one of those voices that you only wish that your boyfriend had just so he can sing to you at night. He is so fine, chai chai chai. I know he needs to sing em to sleep. He can hit ANY note. There’s literally a video of him hitting note they give him. His smile is so damn pretty. I just love him. My favorite song by him is I Want You.

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7. Woody McClain

For those who do not know, Woody McClain is one of the cutest out of the whole New Edition cast because I mean just look at him. Oh my goodness, that FREAKING SMILE! He is just so damn UGH! He needs to marry me, he can’t be single like he cannot be. He is just too damn sexy to be single. CHAI Woody, you just need to call me Mrs. Woody McClain.


8. Bryshere Y. Gray

Last but DEFINITELY not least. This is the one and only Bryshere Y. Gray, y’all seen him on Empire A.K.A Hakeem, (BTW I can’t wait until Empire comes back on. March 22nd, tuning in phone on Do Not Disturb lol). He is so cute and he has the sexiest lips and his dimple and his smile like LORDT I am not worthy! I actually am, I just want to hug him and feel his body lmao!

Well that is the top men of my list, for those who haven’t caught on the theme. I love guys with beautiful smiles, like if you have a beautiful smile and you approach me correctly and have good intentions. Your chances with me have increased by 100. Nisa and I will do a more deeper post on our preferences soon. SO be on the lookout!

Bluebone Signing Out!

Nisa’s Dreamy Men List…

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Hey guys, it’s us again with a little taste of our tastes lol.

Alright so here is a quick list of my real life husbands and boyfriends lol. Also, I do have a type …but this list kind of ranges. Here it is.

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Morris Chestnut.

This is my husband, ok. Anyone who knows me, knows this. And there’s so much debate on who’s better looking between him and Idris Elba. Now Idris is on my list, but Morris is better. If you don’t agree, you’re lame. I am his real wife, but I have to add that he is married to a beautiful BLACK woman, and has been for about 20 sum years. All the more reason why I love him, he has great taste.

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Michael B. Jordan.

I had to put two lol. Anyway Michael (I call him Michael lmao) is my boyfriend. We are not married but we’re cool with that. Now I have always loved him but when I saw Creed and Fruitvale Station, I fell haaaarrrddd in love. Anyway we like to keep things private but he know wassup.

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Lance Gross.

He actually sent me this clip earlier today lol. Every girl wants him butttt, he’s already taken, and he’s been taken by me since his “Be Breezy” days lmao. (If you don’t know what I’m talking about, then where you been at?? lol) We’ve been together for a while now. Ugh he’s such a great guy.

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Chancelor Bennett.

Yea, I call him by his government name because I’m not just a fan, I’m his lady. Yea the one he talks about in his songs, thats me he’s talking about in “All We Got”. Ugh I love that man. It’s his personality you know? And you guys don’t even get to enjoy it 24/7 like me. Him and I are very lowkey, but we are together so quit wondering.

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I taught him this dance, lol we do it together all the time while listening to his songs.

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Idris Elba.

We have been together since Daddy’s Little Girls, which is one of my favorite movies by the way. Look at that man y’all (but not for too long). His walk, his talk, his smooth but edgy demeanor, his everything. Honestly thinking about it, I’m not even sure I place Morris before him anymore, they’re tied. Mmm, maybe not lol.

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Luke James.

You see that one on the end with the pink shirt? Thats mine. Now he’s new to my list but once I saw that movie, I was sold. He’s the best looking one honestly. Also his voice is amazinggg which obviously doesn’t hurt.

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Last but certainly not least…

Dwayne Wayne/ Kadeem Hardison.

Now y’all KNOW I had to add him. Y’all thought I forgot? Oh I could never, this is my real life husband. I’m talking about THE DWAYNE WAYNE. I don’t need to say anymore, just know that him and I are real and forever. We went to Hillman together, and now we live in Brooklyn with our 4 kids. I could talk about him all day, so don’t get me started lol.

Thats my list!… I have great taste don’t I?

We All Ugly to Somebody

Rejection… Dun Dun Dunnn

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Signing in again, is yours truly the Bluebones.

Rejection: Probably one of the hardest things to face and one of the scariest things we anticipate. But, why is rejection so horrible to us? We can admit that it may hurt our ego. “Did he just say no to me?” or, Is the possibility of rejection so terrifying and humiliating? Could it be that we must think something negative about ourselves to even think that someone might think negatively about us? I mean what does that say about what we think of ourselves?

How many times have you not gone after someone or something because of fear of rejection? Yea, when you think about it, probably at least once or twice, or if you’re anything like me then maybe 10 or 100 times lol. But seriously that’s horrible. I mean, we have got to get out of that frame of mind. Just because one person thinks something about you, it does not mean it’s true, necessarily. Remember, we all ugly to somebody.

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Think about it like this: if you have a sibling, or a close cousin, they have probably called you ugly, or fat, or skinny, one or a thousand times or more, right? Butttt for most people, hearing it from a younger brother is nothing like hearing it from a girl at school. And why is that? I know if my brother calls me a name he gets a mush to the forehead. However, when someone else, say a pretty girl, or one of the “cool kids” calls us a name, it’s the end of the world. That is for one simple reason: confidence (or the lack thereof). See, someone confident, and I mean truly confident, or someone secure (thats a better word) wouldn’t even think to care about a comment from another, or rejection. Nope, someone secure just dives right in. Now don’t get me wrong, someone confident could still fear rejection, but there’s other reasons for that too.

Lets face it, rejection is pretty embarrassing. Thats another main reason why we fear it. I mean imagine walking up to someone, hoping to have a connection, so you ask for their number and their like “ew no”! Yeaaaa, that’d be pretty painful to hear. If you’re anything like me, you’d avoid approaching someone for months until you get over it, just to avoid those painful words. But the wise me knows that it’s not good to put off something, just because you might get rejected. If you think about it, we do it for a lot of things. Applying for jobs, shooting our shot, or even following someone on social media in case they don’t follow back! (yea, we all do it). I mean, who wants to live on eggshells like that??

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So the point is, don’t let rejection keep you from doing anything! You gotta believe in yourself, believe in your glo! Ok that sounds corny, but it’s real. It’s not just about looks either. You can’t doubt yourself in any way. Believe in yourself in alllll aspects. Go into things with a positive mindset. And if you get rejected, hey, that’s life, it be like that sometimes. So brush it off and keep going. I mean, we all ugly to somebody right? But so what?

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Socially Anxious or Awkward in College? Not the Wave.

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Time for Some Chit-Chat, Welcome Back… it’s Nisa.

This is for anyone who struggles with confidence, insecurities, or anything of that nature.

So all my life I’ve been pretty shy and awkward. Its always been hard to crack that shell of mine, but being shy is sooo easy. All I have to do is talk to no one, don’t raise my hand, and keep it mute. But if you’re really shy or awkward, you know that in most cases, there’s a reason why. It could be because you’re insecure, or anxious, or fearful, or you seek approval but are worried you won’t get it from your peers. Yea, its pretty complex stuff. As easy as it is, its not a fun life. Like at all. My fellow shy people know what I’m talking about. So now I’m in college, where being shy and anxious is starting to get old. I want to get out of this zone. Because I’m so anxious, I often miss out on things because of fear, or lack of motivation. You see, being socially anxious is comfortable. It’s easy to use this quality as an excuse to say, not socialize, or ask the professor a question. But am I the only one who’s tired of this lifestyle? I cant be. So I have created a little list for us shy, kinda awkward people to not be so shy and awkward, or to actually get by as as shy and awkward, and maybe laugh a little along the way.

  1. Step out of Your Comfort Zone.

Believe me, I know more than anyone that this is easier said than done. And I know how hard it is to simply approach someone with intentions of making a friend, or even more than a friend if you know what I mean. But we have to do those things that scare us, one by one. So make a list of those things that just ain’t so easy for you. Have a question or comment in class? Raise your hand, it’s no big deal! Crushing on someone? Shoot your shot! Or at least say hey and introduce yourself. And don’t rehearse your lines! I know how that sounds but if you want to rid those nerves, you have to just go with things. Literally practicing doing those scary things will make them muuuch less scary. Trust me.

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2. Try and Make Friends With Very Social and Outgoing People.

Ok this is another good one. I have this friend who is by far one of the most confident, social, carefree people I have ever met. When I am around her, I literally do not care about anyone’s opinions. Her attitude is not only admirable, but it’s contagious. Sometimes when I’m not around her and I get all nervous or anxious, I think to myself, “just be how you are when you’re around her” and it works! I’m telling you, having an influence like that in your life is sure to benefit you. It’ll kinda of force you to step out of your comfort zone. Because let’s face it, an introvert plus another introvert makes for one great, but far too comfortable and “introverted” duo.

3. Fake it ‘Til you Make it.

Alright, let me explain. The simple act of pretending to be outgoing, social, confident, or not anxious, will make you all of these things, eventually. Now when I say “fake it”, don’t think I’m telling you to be someone you are not. That’s COMPLETELY different. In this case, you are practicing being your best you at all times. It’s becoming the person you’d like to be. This step is pretty hard, but the trick is to make it look easy. Make yourself look comfortable. Eventually you will feel comfortable, I promise.

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4. Develop a Whole New Attitude.

Okay this one is pretty hard as well. It kinda ties into tip 3. However this is a double tip. So to develop a new attitude is both a mental and physical thing. The first step is mental, because you’re gonna need that mental preparation for the physical part. You’re mindset has to go from anti-social, “I’m in a bubble or shell forever”, to more confident, more positive, “today will be a great day, put a smile on”. In order to do this, you simply have to think positive thoughts 24/7. It sounds hard, but every negative thought you have, replace it with a positive one. This will become habit. Now for the physical, you basically have to wear your new attitude. Now for me, what makes me feel more confident is what I wear. If I put on a fly fit, I feel poppin’. It makes me walk with my head held higher and I feel as good as I know I look. I’ve gotten so good at looking, therefore feeling good, that I know very well I look damn good even in sweats! So the point is to do what will make you feel better about yourself. Make sure that your body language expresses confidence, and surely you will develop confidence. Even if you don’t feel great that day, make it look like you do by simply smiling for instance. Trust me this works. Walk like this, talk like this.

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So whatever your reason for being shy or anxious may be, I hope these tips help you out a little bit. Remember it’s all mental and those thoughts such as “what if I sound stupid” or “what if I trip and fall, or drop something” (yes, the walk from the food line to the table in the cafe is the hardest walk ever for a lot of people lol), or if you’re wondering what people are thinking, trust me, most of those people are not concerned by what you’re doing. It’s all in your head. So carry on, without a care in the world.

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Ode to Heartbreaker

[Whats up guys. Welcome back to Dark Skin & Mangos. It’s Karen, I wrote this post because I needed to vent and I write my feelings out best. Enjoy.]

Dear Boy who broke my heart,

Bottom line, you did it. Didn’t really think that it was possible with me. To his girlfriend now, you do not understand that in all reality, you were just the side piece that got her opportunity and got upgraded to my position. That doesn’t give you the slightest idea or even help you reflect that something is not right here? If you end up marrying him, I can’t wait for the day that you have children with him and your children look up at you and tell you, “Mommy, Daddy, I want to be like her one day.”

You broke my heart and won’t ever understand how bad it even hurts to even try and look at you. I told my mom about you and I never do that for any boy because I hate telling her something about a boy that I just think MAY BE the one for me only to be filled with disappointment afterwards. Because you made it seem like we were forever and a day.You made it seem like time was nonexistent between us. Then you broke my heart, got your closure, and moved on not even within the next 24 hours.

I’ve blamed myself for months because I thought I said something but in reality, you already had another girlfriend before breaking up with me. Just for me to find out that I’ve been treated dirty the whole time. You portrayed yourself to be this guy that means well but something never goes his way. That you have the best intentions but never knew how to handle it properly. Again in reality, that was never the case, you knew what you were doing and you knew how you are.

I’ve been questioning myself for months about you and that we would probably still be together if it wasn’t for that night; you could only make me cry and hurt inside. I missed how you made me laugh, I missed how you made me feel so beautiful, I missed how you kept my hopes up with empty promises and meaningless words.

My friends got tired of hearing me complain and cry about how much I missed you. Quite frankly, so am I.

I can’t wait for the day a man, NOT A BOY, but a man looks at me as if he was starstruck. Is proud to have his hand intertwined with mine with his head held high. Then just for you to think in the back of your head that you could have had something worth having, something that could have benefited you in the long run. Cause my God, my Lord and Savior only has great plans for me. He knows I’m special and even though you didn’t see it, I’m glad one man did. Eventually in the future, two men would see it.

I’m only growing bigger, badder, and greater than the day before. For you to look at me with a face full of regret will be the day you realize that nothing was worth losing me over. I can’t wait for the day a REAL MAN comes to me and can’t wait to turn over my side of the bed and look at my face while I’m sleeping because he’s excited for me to wake up and smile at him. I can’t wait until I grow to love again and feel that same love back. It always seems like I’m the one that loves harder.

I defintely learned my lesson from you:
To never give wifey actions away to someone who doesn’t even see you as his equal or something down the line. 

And the day I do find that MAN, I will be glad that you broke my heart and let me go, dumping me in the trash. He will follow up behind you, dust me off, and give me warmth again. But it will be a greater warmth and WAY past you ability to comprehend what that warmth is.

“Do you talk to someone?”

Dating in the 21st Century

Hey guys, it’s your girl Bluebone and welcome to Dark Skin & Mangos. I’m going to tell you guys something that I am really irritated with in this generation.

DATING & OBTAINING A RELATIONSHIP.

A couple of things about dating and obtaining a relationship this day in age irritates me. But, I’ll speak about it one at a time. Supposedly there is this ‘talking’ stage before getting into a relationship. So, these are the stages are:

  1. The DM approach
  2. Talking Stage
  3. Relationship
  4. Problems within the relationship
  5. Break-up and start rapping on social media

First of all, what is ‘talking’? This pisses me off so much, because what are we talking about?!

Talking is a present tense verb.
Present tense means I am currently doing something.
Verb means action.
Action means I am performing something.

So, what does this mean? Talking means I am having a conversation with one or more people. Look. A guy is not going to approach me, saying “Excuse me, (insert compliment here) and I would like to talk to you.”

Any boy that tells me that, I will look you dead in your face, smile, and tell you that you are talking to me at the moment. You are having a conversation with me. We are talking to each other right this moment. Say that you would like to get to know me, not talk to me.

This whole ‘talking’ stage is where girls and guys get their feelings hurt because THERE IS NO DEFINITION OF ‘TALKING’. Every time I ask someone the define it, they just say “We talking.”

Since there is no definition of talking stage, there’s no real place of where the “relationship” lies. One party thinks they are in a relationship, while the other is out around ‘talking’ to other people.

Like what happened with dating? What happened with courting? What is going on with this generation that social media defines everything in a relationship?

Small secret, I’m 18 years old turning 19 in July and I have not been on a date before. Like ever. I never had a guy take me out, one on one, he pays, and we have a good time. Not a day in my life. If I went out with a guy, I always paid for myself or on some occasions paid for him and myself.

Especially when people give praise to something a girl and a guy does WITHIN THE RELATIONSHIP.

“I’ve always been faithful to my boyfriend/girlfriend for X amount of years.”
Someone then quotes, “Yes! Where are all these boys/girls are?”
Why should I praise you for something that you’re supposed to do? If you really care about that woman/man, it is not hard to remain faithful! It’s common sense.

I am happy with being single and waiting for a guy that is willing to date me. I am not saying that to reject every guy that tries to approach you through the DMs, but don’t jump into a relationship after texting for a couple of days!

Go on dates, take your time to know me, my struggles, my views, my feelings. Don’t jump to the conclusion that I am going to be in a relationship with you after a couple of goo-goo ga-ga conversations.

Comment and let me know what you think.